The other day, Erik asked you for your ideas on new Oscar categories to shake things up a bit. I don't think it's Jon Stewart's fault the Oscar's tanked, but will he be asked back next year? I'm betting not, but who knows? Meanwhile, Cinematical's Chris Campbell, who also writes for Spoutblog.com with former Cine EIC Karina Longworth, has some excellent ideas for ways to boost the Oscar ratings. My favorite among his suggestions is the Gary Busey Red Carpet. Hell yeah! Get rid of Regis, who's about as boring as watching bread get moldy, and bring on the Busey action. He can show up drunk with his fly open, and attack all the talent as they make their walk up the red carpet. It'll be almost like adding a sporting event to the Oscars -- duck and run from Gary Busey before he attacks your neck!
Poor Jennifer Garner would probably have to bring an entourage of everyone who's f*cking her husband, Ben Affleck, to be her body shield against further Busey attacks. For added fun, Busey can bring along his son Jake, who can also get drunk and talk loudly to everyone within ear range about how he's Gary Busey's son. The two of them could become a regular Oscar team like Melissa and Joan Rivers ... only drunker and with less cleavage and plastic surgery.
For more of Chris's ideas, including what Diablo Cody should have really done on that stage, go read the full piece.
1. I honestly couldn't tell if the article was supposed to be a parody, or serious... it was somewhat badly written. I tried to laugh, but ended up taking it seriously (though I certainly may be wrong)... So with that in mind...
Sadly, I think "spouting" is exactly what it was. ALL bad ideas.
He refers to the "abysmal ratings" -- direct quote. But it had something like 36 million people watching, though 3 million less than last year. AND it was the highest rated Nielson show of the week. I mean... 36 million! That's insane! (That's not his fault actually, I've read that elsewhere.)
Having one famous person sing all the songs? Instead of the winners of best song? -- look at the artists from "Once," who did it with depth, emotion and authenticity, very inspirational and moving -- instead, have someone turn it into a pop hit? Strip it of all artistic integrity. How very sad. And look at how joyful they acted when they received the award!
And "mainstream" hits up for awards? Transformers for Best Picture? Oof.
I do agree that a lot of these things would increase viewership... silly as they are. But this year a lot very artistic movies won... good movies, movies that inspire us, touch us, challenge us. Isn't that a good thing -- even if 3 million less people watched?
-Pie
Posted at 10:55PM on Feb 26th 2008 by EatingPie